Things to do on rainy days.....

It has been raining for days and days and I am a suffering a dose of cabin fever. We did as all the other dutiful parents did yesterday and braved winds, rain and mud to spectate the last soccer match of the season, however most of the week has been indoors for Felix and Mummy. I will miss the weekend sports matches as we have a wonderful, interesting and fun group of parents and children in our teams. We mother's have an unspoken rule that of course we saw every detail of every exciting play our children make. Truth is that most of us don't stop to take a breath from chatting for the hour. You really do catch up on lots of news at the match. It seems a shame to have them encourage and support me through the last nine months of pregnancy only to miss the big event. Lachlan played extremely well and scored the two winning goals and showed great sportsmanship which is so rewarding for me as his mum. I am especially proud that he is a real team player and uses great strategy in his game.

I was sure the rain had moved on when I woke to clear sky and sunshine this morning but alas it was a brief reprise. Today is the due date for our new baby and due to the weather, I decided to do some baking to keep me from wondering and waiting for the moment to arrive. Lemon and Poppyseed are a new variation and the family favourite Raspberry and White Chocolate Muffins. There is nothing better than a creamy coffee and fresh muffin while reading the weekend paper. Bliss.....

Special Memories

Next month my grandfather turns 80 years old which I almost don't believe. He is one of the greatest men I know for many reasons and I can't help but reflect on memories and experiences that have included "Grandy". I am the oldest of his seven grandchildren and first called him by "Grandy" as was my limited ability when beginning to talk. Everyone in our family knows him by this name as well as my friends and extended family from other sides. Whenever I see my Grandy, he makes me feel like I was the person he most wanted to see that day. Grandy has a manner that is a blend of gentleness and kindness and humor that is always reassuring to be around. He is tanned with the trademark white sock lines of a man from the land. He works hard and is generous with his time even at this age. He mows lawns for the "old" people....and young for that matter! He paints houses for people who can't themselves. He helps wherever there is a need. A self made man who built a farm and family from humble beginnings. The farm and all that belongs with it is a place I treasure when visiting and hold dear in my heart when thinking about. I remember with great affection the times I have spent at the farm and of staying there for school holidays. We were never in the way and he made everything into a game or fun. He always stopped what he was doing and had time for me or I tagged along. I can't help but shed a tear of happiness and thankfulness when I think about the security, consistency, love and care that this dear man has gifted me with. He is the one person who I always knew (because he told me and still tells me) that he loves me very much. He saw the best in me even at my worst. I treasure most his kindness, gentle and encouraging words and his generous love and care of me. He has put his family above all else and that is a legacy for us to continue. My hope is that I can remember and in turn pass on the legacy that this man has begun in our family to my children and grandchildren. I regret not being able to celebrate with him at his party but with a baby due any day that is just part of the sacrifice of living so far away. Happy Birthday Grandy...xxoo

Patience

I am waiting it seems on so many things.

A baby to arrive, school holidays to start, family to arrive, my dream home, my dream job, twelve hours sleep at the one time, dinner served at a leisurely, civilised pace with cloth napkins and matching plates and polished cutlery, a spotless kitchen and no papers all over the table or toys under the chairs. The children are smiling, my hair and makeup look fabulous and Jon and I engage in lively, cheerful, intelligent conversation (i am just daydreaming, we are all usually just two steps from falling asleep while trying to convince Felix not to throw all his tea on the floor or in his hair, nose, eyes or anywhere else whilst trying to remember if the dog has been fed today).

I know that once these things arrive there will be a list of many more to follow. The list just continues and re-invents itself depending on my current want. Is there another option? We have so many things to be content with now but culture and society urge us on to higher and greater and larger states of wanting, impatience and discontent. We are as a society always waiting and wanting yet no happier than before.

Pause..................

What if i stopped in reflection, counted my blessings, said a prayer of thanks, decided that contentment was a journey worth choosing and pursued that as the most important thing on my list. It is my desire to accept how things are, hope for all that might become, apprecitate all that has been and keep a grateful state of mind for all that I have learned in the waiting.

Dreaming of the Country

Looking at photo's taken on my last trip back home to the country in Queensland has left me feeling somewhat nostalgic. The memories leave me longing for the familiar aspects that seem so deeply ingrained in my thoughts from my growing up years. The smell of the hot sun and dust coating on my skin as I took a walk at the farm to check the crops with my grandparents. The taste of strawberries picked in the heat, still warm from the sun, which taste so sweet and delicious yet at the time I hardly noticed. The ease with which people from the country relate, in good old fashioned hospitality and honesty and integrity. The strong sense of community and belonging which forms when you are born and bred somewhere small. The ability to not take life or one's own importance too seriously. Time has been very kind to me and I remember with affection the great things I gained from the country and the first part of my life. The not so good has gradually faded into a distant and hazy memory. I still dream of a life in the country yet appreciate and enjoy our "city" life we have right now. Who am I kidding, we do after all live in just a big country town. It just comes with water views, fabulous shops, divine restaurants and interesting people, beautiful buildings and many more treasures. We are living the sweet life already.

Winter

I love old buildings, furniture, quilts, objects and anything that tells a story and has some mystery and questions surrounding it. The evidence of being used by another in a past time, the ordinary practicality or the detailed care and attention in it's making. I also have a romantic appreciation of things from the past. I imagine the sense of purpose must be great in constructing the first buildings to grace a place. The sense of pride and satisfaction of a woman completing a warm and comforting quilt for her children. The large and grand proportions of an old building which say, "see we have made our mark". The beautiful colours that have worn over time on the roof and bricks of an outbuilding. The artistic combination of textures in an old home, brick, stone, timber. Strangely these things all seem to remind me of a sense of hope and future and of expectancy. The association between winter and old things is particulary lovely when captured in the beautiful light of a cold, overcast day. The confirmation of the season shown by the lack of leaves on the trees. I have resigned myself to the fact that I am very moved by the appearance and the visual elements of my life. Creating an environment of rest and beauty and inspiration is possibly one of my most defining pursuits. The challenge is to find the balance between contentment and satisfaction of where that has me placed today and not sacrificing the dreams I have for tomorrow................

Bath time

Felix loves bathtime with Daddy. He tells us by pointing and grunting after tea that he is ready to go! He has learnt to clean his teeth and loves having a big chat in the bath. This arrangement works well for me also as I also love to collapse on the couch about this time each day and catch a quiet moment of solitude, rest and reflection on the days events.

Nesting

Today has been busy, busy, busy........we have sorted, cleaned and re-arranged in preparation for the insane household madness that follows when a baby is born. My need to start nesting has definitely arrived and am trying to keep all other family members enthusiastic! We spent yesterday at the soccer watching Lachlan's team defeat the other team from their school by a score of 1-0. This is a fairly normal way for us to spend Saturday mornings, but our superior level of parental committment was confirmed as the entire match was spent in the rain, strong gusts of mountain ice air and I am fairly sure what was small pieces of hail. The consolation was that Lachlan played a superb game and scored the winning goal. I treasure these times watching him and feel so very proud of the young man he is. He has given me so much joy to watch........having boys is so much fun! I had also started the morning with a lovely grown up morning out with two girlfriends at a yummy coffee house. We chatted and laughed and had a delightful morning which was the sustance I needed for the cold match that was to come. Fun and satisfying weekend indeed.